Most people envision sexual abuse as someone physically bigger and stronger overpowering someone else who is more vulnerable in order to perform a sexual act. More often though, sexual abuse has to do with manipulation or not understanding the rules of consent. For example, in a situation where an older boy made out with a younger girl who told him that she was older, they could end up having sex because they had different concepts of what "making out" entailed. Without understanding the basic rules of consent, things can more easily get out of control. Because of this, when dealing with an alleged sexual abuse, it is important to talk about the rules of consent and sexual disclosure.
Examples of some basic rules of consent that you can discuss:
- Within three years of age to each other
- Same level of intelligence
- Same level emotionally
- Permission to say no
- Both say yes
- Both know what is going to happen
- Honesty
- Affection
- No impaired thinking
Warning Signs
Although it is difficult to accept that your son may be involved with sexual abuse, it is better to know so that you can help him. If you are not sure, some signs that you should consider are:
- Catching your son on the computer in the middle of the night
- Erased history on family computer
- Questionable content popping up on your computer
- Friends or family telling you that they’ve noticed your son acting differently
- Not trusting where your son is or what is he really doing
- Your son has stolen underwear or has been involved in criminal behavior or legal issues
A Father Story of Sibling Sexual Abuse
National Sexual Assault Hotline
If you are a victim of rape or sexual abuse and need assistance please call the National Sexual Assault Hotline at 800.656.HOPE (4673).
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Your teen can recover from sexual behavioral problems. Contact one of our trained representatives for a free, private consultation
Listen to our podcast about helping teens with problematic sexual behaviors.
Disclaimer- Please remember that this podcast is not a replacement for therapy, nor do we provide legal advice. Please always seek a mental health professional and lawyer for your situation.
Trigger warning - This podcast contains an in-depth discussion about sexual abuse and may be triggering for people who've experienced a sexual assault. If you are a victim of rape or sexual abuse and need assistance please call the National Sexual Assault Hotline at 800.656.HOPE (4673).
Welcome to "Navigating Problematic Sexual Behaviors in Teens," the podcast designed to support and empower parents of teenage boys who are struggling with problematic sexual behaviors. We understand that parenting through these challenges can be tough, and that's why we're here to provide you with valuable insights, expert advice, and real-life stories to help you on this journey.
Join us as we navigate this journey together, offering you the tools and understanding you need to support your teenage son's mental, emotional, and behavioral well-being. Remember, you're not alone in this, and with the right information and support, you can guide your son toward a healthier and happier path.
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Oxbow Academy is fully operational during the COVID-19 crisis. Contact us if you need help with treatment for sexual addiction, sexual abuse, pornography abuse and other compulsive behavior issues.
Many parents find it difficult to tell healthy curiosity about sex from a potentially dangerous situation. There are clinical evaluations that can help make that determination easier. One of these evaluations is the Sexual Addiction Screening Test (SAST).
On the SAST, you will answer a series of simple yes or no questions about their teen. The answers are completely confidential. No information connects you to your assessment. After you complete the SAST, you will be taken to a new page that shows a score representing the level of risk.
After you get your score, you will have the chance to request a call from someone who can help answer your questions. You will only be contacted if you make a request. Whether you request a call or not, your information will remain confidential, and you will be under no obligation.
