If You Don’t Teach Your Son About Sex, Porn Will

Curiosity about sex is a natural part of growing up. This should not be ignored or shamed. Although it may be difficult or uncomfortable to start the conversation, it is essential to talk about sex with your son because he will seek out other sources to answer his questions if you don’t. These sources include porn sites.

Many porn sites admit that porn isn’t educational in terms of sexual health and development, so they combat that by providing “sex education tools” on their sites. Of course, this is right next to their hardcore pornographic content. Porn sites claim that they’re providing a public service with their sex education tools, but really, porn sites are just trying to to draw in young, curious viewers. It’s ultimately a trap.

Porn sites show videos and images of unhealthy and violent sexual content. It is often based on fantasy, with the idea of “if you can imagine it, than you can find it,” leading teens to deep dark parts of the internet. Due to their underdeveloped brains, teens may often internalize pornography as what is considered “normal sex” and try to replicate what they see. This can lead to major issues. Do you want this to be the site your son trusts for information about sex?

Meaningful Conversation

Talking to your son openly and honestly about sex is one of the most effective ways to combat porn. Some parents worry that they don’t know enough to be a reliable source of accurate information. Understand that you don’t need to be an expert on sexuality to have a meaningful conversation with your son about sex, since every parent can share their values about sexuality, relationships, and respect for others. Some parents also worry that talking about sex will lead to their sons to having sex. In actuality, teens who have talked with their parents about sex are more likely to postpone sex and use birth control when they do begin. And the truth is, your son is already talking and learning about sex from someone/someplace else if they don’t feel comfortable or safe to come talk to you about it.

Topics to Talk About

Although your son may have some concept of these topics due to media, school, or friends, it is still important that you talk with your son one-on-one about sex so that 1) your son can feel comfortable asking you his questions and 2) you can clear up any misunderstandings he gained from other sources. If you’re not sure what to discuss, the following is a list of important topics relating to sex and sexuality.

  • Male and female reproductive systems
  • Sexual intercourse
  • Pregnancy
  • Abstinence/postponing sex
  • Ways to show affection without having sex
  • Birth control
  • Safer sex
  • Sexual orientation
  • HIV/AIDS and other STDs
  • Emotional consequences of sex
  • Warn them about rape (such as date rape, gay rape, etc.), sexual assault, and sexual abuse
  • Identify what a healthy and safe sex life is (and how to recognize sexual abuse)
  • Sexting
  • Dangerous Apps to avoid
  • Consent
Posted in Education